Think of a time in your life—a heated discussion with your spouse, a stressful period at work, a time when you felt overwhelmed by the things going on in your life—when you suddenly and unexpectedly found something humorous in the situation and started laughing. Finding humor in life’s circumstances can often help you personally, but laughter between a husband and wife can defuse tension, increase intimacy, and help you to better navigate rough waters in your marriage and life.
Couples that laugh with each other (note: laugh with each other, not at each other) often have better marriages. Think about it. Older couples that have enjoyed a lifetime of laughing together typically seem to be more pleasant and are more content in their golden years. There are well-documented positive physical, emotional, and psychological effects to laughter. There are also great spiritual benefits to laughter (Prov. 15:13, 15).
Here are a few suggestions on how to increase laughter and humor in your marriage:
- Pay attention to the funny things that happen to you throughout the day, and share them with your spouse at dinner (or whenever you talk).
- Find a television show, or movie, or some other form of media that you both can watch and laugh to together.
- Continually share in “inside jokes” that are just between you and your spouse and can bring your partner a smile at any time.
- Relive humorous stories from your past, both shared experiences and things that happened before you met each other.
- Find a game you can play together to that will give you opportunities to laugh with each other (card games, board games, video games, it doesn’t matter as long as you can laugh together).
- Make silly faces at each other.
- Dress up in ridiculous ways.
- Try to find new and surprising ways to make each other laugh.
It doesn’t matter what you do (as long as your humor is God-honoring and not fueled by the devil), just make each other laugh.
Work on building your own sense of humor, but also work on maintaining a connected sense of humor with your mate. Humor allows couples to process their day in a healthy way and enhances intimacy between partners. It also reduces stress and negative tension. Most of all, as you better connect with each other through humor and laughter you can also better connect with God.
What does God want from my marriage?
A Weekend Marriage Enrichment Retreat
Friday-Sunday, September 13-15, 2013
Fall Creek Falls State Park Inn
Limited to 25 couples
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